• You can tell how much a girl cares about what...

You can tell how much a girl cares about what you’re saying or doing based on her hair. 10 is a perfectly done french twist—1 is a top knot.

Gentlemen, If you want to know how much the girl you’re dating cares, here’s a quick scale and how you should respond:

1: Top Knot—Gives zero shits. Does not care if you are wearing pants or not.

2: Pony Tail—Gives one to two shits. You should keep the door closed if you’re pooping.

3: Pig tails—Don’t use your socks as a napkin.

4: Regular braid—All your farts should be silent. Stop talking about rare Japanese video games and find out what she likes.

5: Straightened—You better get some pants on. Shit’s getting real.

6: Messy waves—You had best hold the car door open if you want to get some.

7: Full head of curls—Go buy some flowers and chocolate not made by Hershey or Nestle.

8: French braid—You may be meeting parents. Get your game face on.

9: Hair curly and half up/half down—This is going to cost you. Hope you have good credit.

10: French twist—Gives 100% shits. Also, very likely marrying you right now.

Once you hit 10 the list goes in reverse, which is why I’m in top knot tight now and our bathroom doors are never closed.

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